Scarlett turned four on Saturday and, as if this wasn't alarming enough, nothing could prepare us for the horror of 8 children hooning about in the manner of drug-crazed lunatics, later in the day. Thank sweet Christ we have a big garden, a sturdy, lockable fence and access to a reliable source of Mace. The day started well, with delight and genuine amazement on the face of our sweet girl as she opened a generous pile of gifts. She went through 3 wardrobe changes that day starting with the ballerina dress we bought her, before moving onto the dress from Maria and finally her birthday suit. 
We had planned her party as a good old-fashioned sports day with egg and spoon, sack, and 3-legged races among others. Rob even bought white spray paint and marked out 8 lanes and the Olympic symbol on the lawn. We had a score board set up and water balloons ready for a game of throw and catch. The weather was perfect as were the large batch of tuna sandwiches I had made. Excitement and anticipation were running at fever pitch as we waited for the first guests to arrive at 3pm.
Of course it wasn't long before the first cries of "it's too hard" filled the air, the games (and tuna sandwiches) were abandoned in favour of a massive water balloon fight, rampant nudity on the part of the girls and birthday cake to finish. While I was disapppointed that our well-orchestrated day failed to impress the kids, they had an absolute riot.
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